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Best game ever ... Brett Geeves offers his thoughts on an epic BBL semi-final. Source: Daniel Wilkins / News Limited
Brett Geeves is back for another installment of his yet-to-be-named column. This time he runs the rule over Australia's rotation system and dissects the best game of cricket he's ever seen.
This rotation business has to stop. We thought we had seen the end of it after the Sri Lankan experiment. Anthem singer Alston Koch was rotated out of the Sydney test in favour of the pretty young lass with potential.The failure of this experiment was summed up well by Sri Lankan master blaster, Tillakaratne Dilshan*: "Unfortunately we should have finished the series off strongly, on a high note. Of course when I say high note, I don't mean a note so high it would paralyse bird's mid-flap, causing them to drop out of the sky; or a note so low it causes you to soil yourself. I mean an Alston note. He is the king of pop and replacing him is harder than replacing a hip with just a chisel and no anaesthesiologist."
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Such is the confusion surrounding the rotation system, John Inverarity, has named Steve Rixon as the nation's new opening bowler while Mitch Starc recovers from shin splints or lower back pain or something. Ben Cutting will take over as head coach while Mickey Arthur has a breather from watching too much cricket, which results in eating too much food; this will lessen the chances of getting gout. It is also reported that Moises Henriques may also be rested, with Humphrey Bear creating history to be the first Australian-born bear to play for his country and the first player in the history of the game not required to wear pants on the field. On a serious note, this is becoming a large issue. There isn't a former player that hasn't weighed into the debate with a thought as to why this isn't working. If former players are coming out in favour of the rotation policy, we certainly aren't hearing about it or they have been silenced by the anti-CA mobsters employed to ... well ... silence people. I'm not sure I hold enough credibility to have an opinion on this one, but let's give it a crack in the hope that someone quotes me in this evening's news, or a local journalist gets hold of these pearls and writes of me and my thoughts. Maybe I'll just write the story myself...
*Denotes a semi made up quote. Dilshan actually said that he was pleased to head into game three on a high note.
BY GEEVES, HE AGREES
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Former Tasmanian and somehow two-time one-day player for Australia, Brett Geeves, has come out in defence of the CA selectors. "Let's be honest, while the rest of us work nine to five and count down the hours to lunch and the next available RDO or public holiday, Australia's elite cricketers are working tirelessly in the nets from 9:30am to 11:30am and from there they have 12:30pm tee times to make" Geeves says.
When quizzed about the stresses of elite level sport, Geeves's mood changes dramatically, "have you ever showered, changed, ate lunch, made the trek from Adelaide Oval to Kooyonga, hit a bucket of balls and made ten straight putts on the practice green in the space of one hour? That is stress and if you can't handle this type of activity, you're not ready to be a full time professional cricketer and will most likely require the rotation policy. The modern cricketer is tough, they are now fitting in hair appointments and feng shui-related yoga around their jam-packed daily schedules. If you think these guys don't work hard and don't deserve time off like you and I, then it's time for self reflection."
As the debate rolls on, you can rest assured that the cricket loving public will be asking themselves this question: How did that guy play for Australia?
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The best match ever...
Last night's KFC T20 Big Bash League semi-final between the Stars and Scorchers was without doubt the best game of cricket I have ever seen. I will openly admit to disliking cricket as a spectator. I have the attention span of a wombat, named Karl, who has been run over by a tractor. But last night's game had it all; so many sixes, Shaun Marsh batting and speaking on live TV, Brad Hodge's six over cover was dreamy, Alex Keath looking like poor Karl with the tractor lights in his eyes and then there was the last over. OH. MY. GOODNESS.
How is it possible that on the last ball of the game, the bowler and captain can discuss their plan for two minutes and not see there were only three men in the circle, leaving one too many men on the boundary? To make it worse, the bowler has coughed up a front foot no ball, which I guess can be forgiven. The intense nature of that last ball, the rising adrenalin and nervous energy can all be attributed to the bowler over-striding by an inch. Leaving an extra man out of the circle, on the most important ball of the tournament, is as inexcusable as kicking a Labrador puppy. James Faulkner went from being the greatest finisher in Australian cricket and the resultant hero for the Stars, to being the villain in the space of seven centimetres and also sharing the attention span of Karl. You have to feel for the boy. He will learn from this. Sadly, the captain might not get a chance at redemption.
The other lad you have to feel for is Alex Keath. This is a kid who was named as a priority pick by the Gold Coast Suns. He made the decision to give cricket a go and after Wednesday night, you wonder if hindsight is a word he has used a few times today? One over for 26 is the nature of the game. We've all been there. I once bowled four overs for 64 runs on national TV!!
All you can do sometimes is look at the positives. Imagine if on your debut for the Gold Coast Suns, you got smashed by a rampaging Max Rooke, who had run from the back pocket to half-forward, just to ensure your face made contact with his shoulder and then the ground. Getting smacked by Shaun Marsh, Michael Dighton or David Warner in a game of cricket may dent your ego and may also leave you a touch bloated after you've comforted yourself with a four-litre tub of ice-cream and a chick flick. What it won't do, is dent your cheekbone, fracture your eye socket or leave you dizzy and confused. These are positives.
Brett Geeves is a regular columnist for foxsports.com.au. Unfortunately, Brett isn't clever enough to come up with his own column name and desperately needs your help. Two words and no profanities please...
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